News

Beige Brigade Bodybuilding

8 May 2005

A new era of Beige Brigade insanity was ushered in by Mike "Velvet Underpants" Lane at the recent Capital Bodybuilding Champs in Wellington. Through his work at ZM, Mike was challenged to pump some iron and make his debut in the bizarre yet strangely intriguing world of bodybuilding.

For about 12 weeks he stuck steadfastly to a diet primarily consisting of protein shakes, broccoli and chicken - no carbos. The flab fell off him and he ended up looking like this - note the fluffy brown velvet knickers, and the thick golden brown paste which is the hallmark of a true bodybuilder.

On the night the event was far more serious than anticipated - posedowns, androgynous looking women, ripped bodies, acres of muscles on stage and popping out of t-shirts in the audience. If crowd reaction was the criteria Mike would have been in the medals - his Fat Freddies Drop music music broke down before his routine so he took it upon himself to spur the crowd into creating his own soundtrack after fielding a volley of abuse from his supporters in the crowd ("love the velvet", "who's your daddy?", "oooo yuuuuuk").

The results were, needless to say, highly amusing. Click on the photo of the bronzed Adonis below for more, or click here. And note that after the event was over, a thousand beers and bourbons were consumed as well as mountains of mussels, squid and other foods previously banned from the strict dieting regime. Great stuff chap!